What If?

What if I don't want to get motivated? 

What if I like the darkness, the unmoving of the body, the countless thoughts, slow and boring music which makes no tune, rhyme or sense?

What if this is how it is and making it better would actually make it worse? 

I don't know what to do in and with life any more, 
Cos
What if this life we're living, is a dream in disguise..?

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